I have a hangover today. Okay, not hangover anymore I just start drink wine again and I feel much better now. Not sure what I have right now hangover or I am getting drunk again. Yesterday I had a great day and time but I am a bitch. All day I was working and after work, I had a date with the man from the internet. It wasn’t just a dating.
His name is Andre. We met on the internet site http://www.seekingarrangement.com or something like that. The funniest thing is that I am there almost 4 years and never find there nothing. I actually didn’t search and wasn’t active there. That site is for a sugar daddy and sugar babies. I am the fucking slut I know. I can sleep with a man for money because I was in prostitution when I was 17 and you cant go away from that “easy money”. Even I live normal women’s life-job, studies etc. I still sometimes meet with men for money.
I never had a sugar daddy and sugar babe relationship but I was in that seekingarrangement site because I wanted to try that. Till now I still didn’t try because I even can not meet with someone from there. When someone writes me I look at the picture and I understand that even for money I don’t want to be with him. Sugar daddy and sugar babe relationships are different.It’s not that you sleep one time with someone and that is it you forgot. It’s like you are in a relationship with someone but you need to do everything that other side wants. Actually, I don’t know how it is. One time sleep for the money it’s much easier than being in a relationship with someone.
Okay, anyway. Andre wrote me on that site and offer straight away meet for coffee to discuss our arrangement. I agree. In the picture, I cant see him perfectly but he looks nice. With tan, black hairs, fit etc. We arrange to meet at 17:30 after work in one seafront hotel cafe. I was wondering why he wants to meet in hotel cafe? I thought definitely I am not going to sleep with him today. I will just talk, discuss “our arrangement” how he said and that’s it. I feel very nervous because I am not used to meeting like that. I even didn’t know what kind of arrangement I could discuss because I didn’t know what I need. I just need a money and that’s it 😀 As more as I cant get and that’s it 😀
Ok. I come to the hotel cafe first, I text him and he said he is coming. I sit near the table and understand that it is so quiet place and I will feel so uncomfortable here to discuss “arrangement” thing but there was no way back anymore. After 2 minutes, Andre come. My first thought was: “Fuck, really? In the picture, you look thin and you are fat.Fucking lier but with a nice face”. I should stay of course. I like men who wear suits and he definitely wears it. In the suit, every man looks good. I love it. But even with the suit, I saw that he is fat, ok.not that fat but he looks big. I even don’t feel that he is that fat, he is probably big by himself, but still, he is handsome Italian guy.
Anyway, what I can expect Bred Pit who are searching a sugar baby? By the way, if someone doesn’t know what is a sugar daddy (SD) and sugar baby (SB). SD is a man who is searching for a girl to have fun with her, go out for dinners, restaurants, maybe travel together, go to the spa together, have sex anytime he wants and at the same time not be in a serious relationship. In general, he uses a girl how he wants and when he wants, but you are not in serious relationships. SB is a girl who accepts all that kind of conditions in return for financing help.
Fuck I think I am drunk again. P.S. I was drunk fall to sleep for some hours and now wake up.
So I met with Adrea. In the beginning, I thought it will be awkward meeting but when we start talking I understand that we have a lot of common things and it’s easy to talk with him. He is not that bad and also he asks me what kind of arrangement I want? I could not answer at the beginning because I don’t know how it is. He asks me do I want to have gifts, or go to nice restaurants, or travel. I said straight away that I need someone who would pay rent for my apartment. For him it was okay.
In general, we had a nice talk but he needed to go and meet with his friend for dinner. I thought that actually if he will be interested in me I could really try to have that SD and SB relationship. We drink wine and after that, I go home.
Later in the evening Joseph text me. He wants to meet. We didn’t meet for a long time. As I drink wine before I agree because wanted to drink more 😀 I meet with Joseph and we drive to the very nice place, with a beautiful view. We drink wine and I talk and talk and Joseph said to me: “You know I really like you”. What should I answer to him? I answer: “I like you too”. At the same moment, I knew that I am lying and I feel disgusting. I didn’t like him as a man. He is very nice to me, great guy but I don’t see him as my boyfriend. Also, today I was in date with Andre and talk about our arrangement and now I am sitting with Joseph and telling him that I like him.
I thought…Joseph, if you would know what kind of bitch I am. We didn’t meet more than a week and I date with 2 guys in this time. Ok. I didn’t have sex but I date. I don’t want to hurt him but he is only one in Malta who is so nice to me. I don’t know no one here. And when I am drinking I am so nice to him, he likes me but when I am not drinking I even not sure that want to meet Joseph.