I am 16, he is 29 – Lovers (12/09/2012)

Too young to be lover

     I want to tell my story. I was 16 years old and I wasn’t interested in no one guy in school, no one guy outside of school. I had little sympathy to someone but in general, didn’t care about them. One day I meet one man on the internet, who lives around 300 km from my small city.

lovers

At that moment he was  29 years old (I didn’t tell him that I was 16). We decide to meet and he drives to my small city. When we finally meet, we were sitting in the car and I remember I told him, that I am 16 and he told me that he is married and he has three kids. He also was so shocked that I am 16. But at that moment when he said that he is married, I wasn’t so stupid and I straight away understand that he is searching for a lover.

It was winter, outside was really cold, and as I was living in the small city I didn’t want to go out somewhere with him, that’s why we just sit in the car and talk. But wtf. he was driving to me 5 hours in snowing weather, just for TALK 😀 and drive 5 hours back. 😀 When I saw him the first time, everything inside just starts shaking. I thought I just met ideal men. Ideal visually. He was so fucking handsome. Black, little longer, shiny hairs, very little beard under the lip (I don’t know why but that time I liked it and it seemed cool). Hairs were brushed to one way of the face. Brown eyes and tan skin. His face was so lovely, so lovely that seemed that he cant hurt no one. His body was just awesome.

     He was also with great, big, black, shiny car jeep. Actually, he wasn’t that tall probably that’s why he bought big car 😀 16 years old girl, of course, from that kind of men with that kind of car will be affected. So I was.

    We talked some time in the car, but at the end of the meeting he said to me that he likes me too much, that is why we can’t meet anymore because he loves his wife and cants afford that kind of strange feelings. I answered to him that I was not going to agree to be his lover.

     We say goodbye to each other and I went home. I was going home and I was feeling so strange, I could not understand my feelings. I knew he is going back home now and I will not meet never again him, but I wanted to meet him again…I wanted to meet him again so badly. At that day I put my pink glasses on my face. I was so affected by him.

     While I was going home that evening I had hundred and one thoughts in my mind. Then I remembered that he said “I like you too much that’s why I don’t want to meet with you again” and I decide probably he said so because I actually didn’t like to him and he just want to be careful with my feelings, he probably didn’t want to hurt me just. I thought – it’s not possible that that kind of man would like me, it’s just not possible…maybe write him an SMS. I can’t even concentrate and keep walking. I just stand in the street and stupidly smiling.

     It takes me so long time to think, think, think, but at the end, I send him an SMS: “You can say me a truth if you didn’t like me. I will understand and its okay.” I was so nervous while I was waiting for message back, but when I saw he texts me back my heart was beating so hard. I open the message and he wrote: “I like you more as I would like someone, I didn’t expect that it’s too dangerous to continue to meet with you because I like you too much and also because you are 16”. Here I completely fall in love…

To be continued…I am tired to type more here today.

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